You can’t imagine it, the singer says. At that moment readying for her new album launch in eight years, deeply enamored with her newish partner, and at long last the mother of a toddler after struggling to conceive for a decade, riding high. Suddenly in spring she was told she had cancer in her breast.
The singer-songwriter, real name J. Cornish, is renowned for being brutally honest. The record, her latest release, was supposed to be an transparent story, tackling every ounce of devastation she’d faced since she last worked on songs (a gynecological condition, pregnancy loss, broken romances, emotional abuse, suicidal thoughts) with characteristic openness. The lead track, the song No Secrets, was released in April. But by then there existed a huge secret. The cancer. Then follow-up track, Living My Best Life, was released in late spring and Cornish was giving interviews about how she was enjoying life to the fullest, while all the while dealing with breast cancer. A month later she shared the news, and in early July she had a mastectomy.
She gives me her best “What the fuck?” glance. “I release with a song called No Secrets. I’m giving every interview, and they’re, like, ‘Any updates?’ and I respond, ‘Well, not much…’” Cornish has just had to call off performances because she’s still waiting for reconstructive surgery.
We’re at a photography studio in London. She is wearing a beige fake-leather jacket, denim trousers with detailed white appliqués, beige footwear and oversized specs. Picture motorcycle style meets 1970s Nana Mouskouri. “As if I’m in the 70s and I should have a man with facial hair.” Easy Rider, I say, recalling the picture. “That’s what people called me at school!” She smiles. Cornish is sharp-witted, unfiltered and filter-free. She says she has always fancied doing comedy and is aiming for her first comedy performance next year. “I enjoy humor. When performing I often tease the audience.”
Medical Challenges and Discovery
Cornish was preparing for an slot at the Baftas when she found a lump. “I quickly sought to get it checked, had an ultrasound, and they were, like, ‘It appears fine; your breasts are normal.’ And I responded, ‘However, it’s there. I have arm pain and tingling in my hands whenever I wake up.’ And they replied, ‘How about a biopsy?’ That was 28 March, the following my birthday.” It was a weekend eve. The specialist told her if it was serious she’d reach out on the start of the week. By then she had persuaded herself it was fine. The way she explains it, it was inopportune to get cancer when she had so much on.
“We’re two weeks away from releasing the album after years away and an extended break. And the doctor messaged and said, ‘Are you free at six?’ And I was, like, ‘Oh, it’s a Zoom, it won’t be anything.’ So I log in believing it’s all going to be positive, and she informs me, ‘Are you sitting down?.’ You know that sad tone they use? And she reveals, ‘I regret to inform you but your biopsy results have shown high-grade cancer cells.’” What did you say? “I said, ‘Oh, that’s not ideal, is it?. That’s not fucking great timing.’ The first thing I thought was, ‘I can’t die because my son needs me.’”
I’ve been labeled difficult for knowing myself
She considered the operation terrifying and absurd. “I fear going under. You’re escorted. During crises you are wheeled, but now I just walked with a gown on and my backside out. Like a dystopian scene.” But, she adds, she’s been blessed. Without chemo or radio, just the op. “Cancer sucks, man, but yet Thank fuck I found it early. I had the mastectomy four months ago and my one side now looks like a fruit under fabric.” A further beam. “I got to keep the nipple, though.”
The follow-up procedure is for health and appearance. Her boobs, she notes, are now “uneven. The size doesn’t match. That’s impolite! I reflected, don’t add insult to injury, I’m already having a hard period. So rude! Ironically I said I’d never get my boobs done because I’ve got perfectionism, and I know they’d never be flawless. Cancer ruined that plan.”
Previous Struggles
She is no stranger to illness. She thinks her attitude toward illness has been so positive because she’s experienced in medical emergencies. They have often coincided with peak moments, acting as a reminder, or blow, to make her recall not to be complacent. “Honestly, I feel life goes, ‘Things going well? Take a seat.’ Since childhood, it has consistently accompanied achievements for me; something severe or obscure has impacted my body.”
She reminisces to her youth, already starting her career performing in the stage in Whistle Down the Wind (she was cast at the age of nine years old). That’s when she was diagnosed with the cardiac issue a syndrome, which can cause a rapid pulse as well as vertigo and heart flutters. “I rehearsed between visits on an intravenous line, and going back into hospital at night.” She jumps ahead several years, and teenage Jess has joined the female band Soul Deep while studying at the performing arts school. “I signed my initial contract, and I had a cerebral event. Then when I was about to put out music in the year 2020 I had a automobile accident and my throat was injured and I lost my voice for a twelve months.”
Oi, I say, wait, I can’t keep up. A stroke so young? She nods|agrees
